I HAVE to see this

Good thing it's showing all over georgia...pshh.

New Jersey for the week

A few favorites from LookBook. I'm in New Jersey visiting family for Thanksgiving; primarily my grandmom. She was diagnosed with lung cancer a few weeks ago. I didn't consider the extent of her condition until I saw her. She's constantly coughing and wheezing(can't even walk through the grocery store without getting mildly winded), she's lost 14 pounds and not to mention her spirits are lowering with every passing hour. Can you blame her though? Between the lack of sleep, weekly doctor's appointments and overwhelming exhaustion, she's breaking. She is a strong woman and will get through this, that we are all confident in. I know she in nervous, that has been clearly conveyed, but I think in a way it is setting her mind at ease. Death is inevitable. She has been reminded of this for the past 20 years with the passing of my poppy, the majority of her friends, and all of her sisters, she is the last one left. She knows it's her time. I know it is to. Every time I lay down and pray I want to be selfish and beg for her automatic healing, but I know I can't. If it isn't her time God will sweep the tumor away and keep her with us longer, but if that isn't the case it is time to let her go. She misses my poppy. I pray that she won't suffer; she's not scared of dying, she's scared of the pain. I can't express my dislike of this whole lung cancer thing. Taking my dog and now my grandmom. Please keep her in your prayers. He will take care of this, this I am confident in, please just pray for Him to take the pain away. It will be a long, rough road for her, but ultimately this is where she's ready to be.






p.s.- New Year's resolution: REVAMP MY BLOG.

put some pointe shoes on and feel the fashion

this makes me miss ballet. not that I was anywhere near doing pointe, but still. it's beautiful.

xoxo

It's been a Frank Sinatra kind of day

As always, I'm insanely excited about the future. Today's agenda has included: looking at FIT in NY, looking at apartments in Chelsea, Manhattan, looking up flights/train rides/hotels for New York...I'm going to New York one way or another. I'm thinking of going in February and taking my sister along for the ride. We'd fly to Philadelphia, stay a night or two with my grandmom then take a train into New York. Then we'd stay somewhere in Times Square for 2 nights while visiting FIT, visiting New York Academy of Dramatic Arts for Katie(sister), and shopping of course. Hopefully some interviews for internships for me and model castings for Katie fall somewhere in there too. I know this idea seems so far-fetched at the moment, but I know I can do it. I have to. I've never wanted something this much. I'm meant for much more than what I'm doing now, I just know it. I HAVE to be in New York.

Of course this won't be for two more years when Katie has graduated high school...but I'm just planning ahead, for once.





Follow your dreams and never give up. I'll be looking back on these days.
xoxo

thinking of being lydia from beetlejuice for halloween, yes??

Marc, be mine.

ya know ya know

Ensemble for work tomorrow? Oooohhhyeesss(at least the makeup part; the cat ears might scare off a few patients at the doctor's office(where I work)).


"I have lived on the lip of insanity, wanting to know reasons, knocking on a door. It opens. I've been knocking from the inside."
-- Rumi

Fall inspirations(thus far)

I'm trying to get better at posting more often(key word trying). This week has been pretty decent so far, nothing too substantial. Other than the fact that I've seen Andy Hull more this week than my own best friend. Plans for the remainder of September: try something new with my hair for fall(suggestions? I'm looking more towards color change rather than cut), tattoo, own a pair of thigh high boots, and...a few other non-mentionable-worthy items.

Those pictures are Paris street fashion randoms. I can't wait for heavy fur coat winter. Hope everyone is having a wonderful week!

Want Ad's

Looking for:
-a car
-an apartment
-a wonderfully paying job close to Atlanta
-some space college credits laying around seeking a transcript
-someone to share something with(this one varies day-to-day/hour-to-hour)
-new and re-vamped wardrobe

these items will be found and claimed as MINE...when?

who knows.

I feel like every time I post something there's always a) a list of some sort and b) something new that I want. Does that say much about me? Neh. ...And this is why I've never had a boyfriend. Too many options in life, why stay tied down and pick only one?

(This post has turned into a compilation of thoughts accumulating over the past 2ish weeks)As I was doing my nightly research before bed last night-rewind: I've been thinking a lot about not getting married(I know I'm young but just look at my posts, they're so all over the place from the punctuation to the sentence structure, HOW COULD I EVER MANAGE A HUSBAND. No thanks!) and just adopting a little girl from China-I looked up stories of single mom adoptions and the particular story I clicked on, the first one mind you, was about a mom and her newly adopted daughter Molly. Sign? I'll take it. As I make these loosely configured "plans" I just wonder what God is doing up there. Laughing I'd hope. Although this outcome would be nice, I'd like to dream that He has more planned for me than I'd ever be able to create on my own. Of course He does, but then again, what if that is it? Either way-I'm moving to New York. Atlanta first, then New York.

bcbg and some swedish fish

outfit details:
navy blazer-brother's closet
vneck-charlotte russe
shorts-american eagle
suede heels-bcbg

the stress is cumulating, as you can clearly see on my not-so-clear skin. So many things on my to-do list, and I'm not even taking classes this semester! Lord, imagine if I was.

I hope everyone is doing well and living a stress-free week! If the stress is caking on quite thickly for you as well, there's a light at the end of the tunnel. Just keep persevering!

xoxo

ps-i think i broke my toe today..again...helping the salvation army guy move our broken tv out of our house. lovely! oh and those brown boots are the ones I got at the mart when I worked the fashion show. $30!!!